Autobots, ROLL OUT!

We watched the new Transformers movie last night on Pay Per View. Why, oh why, did no one tell me to go see it on the big screen? I can’t even count how many times last night I said “we should’ve seen this in the theater”. Of course, I spent most of the movie laughing out loud, repeating things, or talking to the screen. So maybe it’s a good thing I saw it at home.

I didn’t watch the cartoon back when I was a kid, so I vaguely knew about it. I mean, who can be a geek these days and not have heard of Optimus Prime or Megatron? But still, the only reason I watched it last night was because WhatsHisFace wanted to and I’ve been a pseudo-fan of Shia LaBeouf since I watched the movie Holes (To WhatsHisFace: that is the name of the movie and I’m putting it on the Netflix queue cause you need to see it. To Jasmine: No that is not a porn movie!). What’s not to like? It’s got a charismatic kid/teen lead, a strong but gorgeous romantic interest, explosions, stupid government officials, smart government officials, hackers that help save the day, courageous and hot military guys who also happen to be smart, and giant robots.

I ended up becoming even more of a fan of both LaBeouf and Michael Bay. The Autobots delighted me. The actors were great. There were moments in the movie that caused me to laugh harder than I have in a long while. There was just something about Mojo (his chihuahua) peeing on a huge alien robot. And not just any Autobot, oh no. Mojo peed on Ironhide, the weapon specialist. And it just gets better when Sam apologizes by telling Ironhide that Mojo has dominance issues. Tiny dog, huge robot, dominance issues. It still gives me giggles.

Ironhide: You have a rodent infestation.
[aiming cannons at Mojo]
Ironhide: Shall I terminate?
Sam Witwicky: No! No! This is a chihuahua. We love chihuahuas.
Ironhide: He’s leaked lubricants all over my foot!
Sam Witwicky: He did? Bad Mojo! Bad!
Ironhide: Bad Mojo! Ugh, this is gonna rust…

Then there were other moments that almost made me cry. Mostly having to do with Bumblebee. I was really not happy when the government twits took him prisoner and tortured him, but the real capper was when he was crawling on the ground to get to Sam towards the end. They’re just lucky he turned out all right, that’s all I’m saying.

I ended up wandering around the house after the movie doing the “Autobots, ROLL OUT!” quote. And I have to confess that when I went out into the garage to get a drink mid-movie, well… I looked at my little sports car (Celica) and really kind of expected it to transform. But I definitely did not ask it why it wouldn’t transform for me, no, uh uh, nope, wasn’t me.

Rating: Solid A

Dark Phoenix, Here I Come!

You Are Jean Grey

Although your fate is often unknown, you always seem to survive (even after death). Your mind is your greatest weapon, literally! Powers: telepathy and telekinesis, the ability to project thoughts into the mind of others, communication with animals

Which of the X-Men Are You?

Seriously, I covet her hair. Not the movie Jean Grey (because, oy that was nasty) – the comic one. And I really covet Dark Phoenix’s hair. It always looked like it was being blown around by the perfect amount of wind. One of the things that I laughed about My Super Ex-Girlfriend was that whenever G-girl was around, she had the wind in her hair thing going on. Even when she was unmasked in her apartment. One minute, she’s all mouse-y brown hair with no movement, the next she’s all blond and there’s a wind on her and nobody else.

Movie Quicktake

Saw a few more movies this past week (slowed down since the parental units were in town):

• Drawing Flies – I put it in queue because Kevin Smith shilled for it on his blog. I enjoyed seeing Jason Lee, Jason Mewes, Joey Lauren Adams, and even Kevin Smith revising his Silent Bob thing. And Jason Lee carried the movie well – if I’d seen it before My Name Is Earl and Chasing Amy, it would probably have had more impact. As it was, I already knew he is spectacular and very capable of carrying the lead. Unless you want to round out your View Askew viewing, I’d say it’s not a must-see. Rating: D+/C-
• My Super Ex-Girlfriend – I was pleasantly surprised by this one. The previews didn’t hook me and I put it on the Netflix queue out of desperation at having nothing else in queue. Luke Wilson was fantastic as the downtrodden insane-girl magnet, and Uma Thurman was both scary and pathetic as the insanely charged super scorned ex. And oh, Eddie Izzard was a surprise treat. We’re both fans, and neither one of us knew he was even in this movie. Rating: B
• Highlander: The Source – I had such high hopes for this one. Adrian Paul, Peter Wingfield (mmmmm Methos), and Jim Byrnes all looked really good. Like they hadn’t aged a day since the TV show ended. But boy did it turn into one hot mess at the ending. It wasn’t as damaging to Highlander as that gods-forsaken thing they released in 1991, which shall forever be banished from our memories, so say we all. But still, what the heck were they thinking? Rating: D-

Movie Monday

For want of a better topic, let’s talk movies. Between Netflix and our OnDemand cable, I’ve been watching a ton of stuff lately. Mostly while playing WoW on WhatsHisFace’s laptop. Yeah, I know.

• Because I Said So: Diane Keaton at her most manic and shrill. Less Mom freak-outs and more of the other daughters would have raised it up a few grades. D
• Stomp The Yard: Completely predictable, pretty stars, fun dancing stomping. C
• Premonition: Love Sandra Bullock and Julian McMahon, and I was expecting the movie to completely trash a coherent time-line. It didn’t, but that’s not saying anything. Ending F- (really, is that the lowest score I can give it? How about T for throw things at the screen?) Everything but the Ending C+
• The Fountain: Odd movie, and I’m still not really sure if I liked it or not. I’d give it either a B+ or a C
• The Queen: Being American and not particularly enamored with Diana, I missed a lot of this when it happened. It was fascinating to see how very out of touch the whole lot of the HRH and their assistants really were. Plus Helen Mirren was fabulous. A-
• Down in the Valley: I missed the ending the first time around and had to go back to finish it up. That might have tempered my opinion. It’s another odd movie. All four of the principal actors were achingly good. B+

Movie Monday

For want of a better topic, let’s talk movies. Between Netflix and our OnDemand cable, I’ve been watching a ton of stuff lately. Mostly while playing WoW on WhatsHisFace’s laptop. Yeah, I know.

• Because I Said So: Diane Keaton at her most manic and shrill. Less Mom freak-outs and more of the other daughters would have raised it up a few grades. D
• Stomp The Yard: Completely predictable, pretty stars, fun dancing stomping. C
• Premonition: Love Sandra Bullock and Julian McMahon, and I was expecting the movie to completely trash a coherent time-line. It didn’t, but that’s not saying anything. Ending F- (really, is that the lowest score I can give it? How about T for throw things at the screen?) Everything but the Ending C+
• The Fountain: Odd movie, and I’m still not really sure if I liked it or not. I’d give it either a B+ or a C
• The Queen: Being American and not particularly enamored with Diana, I missed a lot of this when it happened. It was fascinating to see how very out of touch the whole lot of the HRH and their assistants really were. Plus Helen Mirren was fabulous. A-
• Down in the Valley: I missed the ending the first time around and had to go back to finish it up. That might have tempered my opinion. It’s another odd movie. All four of the principal actors were achingly good. B+

No Surprise There…

Your results:
You are Kaylee Frye (Ship Mechanic)

Kaylee Frye (Ship Mechanic) 70% Zoe Washburne (Second-in-command) 70% Dr. Simon Tam (Ship Medic) 60% Wash (Ship Pilot) 50% Alliance 50% Malcolm Reynolds (Captain) 40% Derrial Book (Shepherd) 35% Inara Serra (Companion) 30% River (Stowaway) 30% Jayne Cobb (Mercenary) 20% A Reaver (Cannibal) 5%

You are good at fixing things. You are usually cheerful. You appreciate being treated with delicacy and specialness.

Click here to take the Serenity Firefly Personality Test

No Surprise There…

Your results:
You are Kaylee Frye (Ship Mechanic)

Kaylee Frye (Ship Mechanic) 70% Zoe Washburne (Second-in-command) 70% Dr. Simon Tam (Ship Medic) 60% Wash (Ship Pilot) 50% Alliance 50% Malcolm Reynolds (Captain) 40% Derrial Book (Shepherd) 35% Inara Serra (Companion) 30% River (Stowaway) 30% Jayne Cobb (Mercenary) 20% A Reaver (Cannibal) 5%

You are good at fixing things. You are usually cheerful. You appreciate being treated with delicacy and specialness.

Click here to take the Serenity Firefly Personality Test

Weekend In Review

Let’s see… there was puking, there was wine, a picnic (probably where I picked up the food poisoning), helping a friend build a deck (mostly supervising for my part), lots of not sleeping (yeah, puking will do that to ya), picking up dog poop, weeding, and laundry. I know, I know. Sexy, huh?

And then I woke up this morning and knew it had been a bad night. I’d been dreaming all night and in each dream, I stopped everything to take pain meds.

Happy Monday to me. *sigh* How was your weekend?

PS – But the new Harry Potter movie RAWKED! Now I want to reread The Half-Blood Prince so I’m fresh for the final book. I plan on starting Sunday and heaven help WhatsHisFace when he tries to distract me.

Weekend In Review

Let’s see… there was puking, there was wine, a picnic (probably where I picked up the food poisoning), helping a friend build a deck (mostly supervising for my part), lots of not sleeping (yeah, puking will do that to ya), picking up dog poop, weeding, and laundry. I know, I know. Sexy, huh?

And then I woke up this morning and knew it had been a bad night. I’d been dreaming all night and in each dream, I stopped everything to take pain meds.

Happy Monday to me. *sigh* How was your weekend?

PS – But the new Harry Potter movie RAWKED! Now I want to reread The Half-Blood Prince so I’m fresh for the final book. I plan on starting Sunday and heaven help WhatsHisFace when he tries to distract me.

Pass The Popcorn

It’s been movie week around here. We saw Ocean’s Thirteen and Pirates of the Caribbean: At World’s End at the theater this weekend and Black Snake Moan courtesy of Netflix last night.

Ocean’s was slick and pretty and fast moving and mostly empty. I’d have to say the thing that made the biggest impact was the sense that the guys involved really liked one another. Both in character and out. The other thing that I was left with was probably unintentional and sort of sad: I feel bad for Jennifer Aniston. There was a bit at the end of the movie where Clooney and Pitt take jabs at one another in that “this is what guy friends do” and “isn’t this cute, we’re talking real life disguised as movie dialog” way. It was cute at first, but the jab that Clooney hit Pitt with was “You should relax and have a couple of kids.”

And just like that, all I could think about was the whole Anistion/Pitt/Jolie mess and how that one line would probably ruin the movie for anyone who was on “Team Aniston“. And I don’t really mean us out here in the media-fed peanut gallery, but more that here she and her friends and family have a slap in the face in this large-budget, high profile movie. And maybe it has nothing to do with the Aniston/Pitt split, but at least for me, it only served to smash me out of whatever movie place I was in and back into the world of ugly and nasty. *

As for Pirates, well…. Man, oh man Orlando Bloom just gets more and more delicious as he gets older, doesn’t he? Ahem, right. Movie impressions. I liked it better than the second but not as much as the first. It wrapped up the story, and gave a healthy dose of Captain Jack Sparrow, which is a good thing in my book. I’m not going to give spoilers, but I will say that the ending stayed with me for several days. It wasn’t as bad as with Zoe and Wash for various reasons, but there is a lingering sadness/bittersweetness there.

Now, Black Snake Moan. Wow. I think I’m probably going to have to buy the DVD, and it’ll probably take another viewing or two to wrap my brain around the whole thing. And I’m not even sure I can articulate why. It’s not going to be for everyone, but if you can keep an open mind, don’t get too disturbed by sex or sexual images, and put aside judging, then it’s a wonderful ride. The performances by Samuel L. Jackson and Christina Ricci ** are amazing along with some fantastic supporting performances by S. Epatha Merkerson and John Cothran Jr. I’ve liked Merkerson in the TV roles I’ve seen her in, but Cothran is new to me.

So that’s it for the movie side of things. I know this is probably pretty scrambled and vague, but that’s pretty much me these days.

* – Maybe it’s wrong, but I’m not really liking Pitt or Jolie much these days. Yeah, yeah – saving the world, adopting orphans, bleah. I don’t really know why Pitt and Aniston divorced, and I don’t much care. If it didn’t work out, then it didn’t work out. But the photo spread with Jolie and the other probably scripted paparazzi photo ops just smacks of poor taste and self-publicity. And just when I thought that I could separate all that from the man’s performance, the line in Ocean’s brought it all back. Which is a shame, because I really do think he’s a talented actor and probably a guy who got caught up at the moment. Bad taste guys, at least to this chick.
** – Now I know why she lost all the weight. She spends a good part of the movie barely dressed. She looks almost like a completely different person in this flick.